Maa'lish Habibi - Communicating with Arabs

Communicating with Arabs is a complex process. Not only does the average Arab speak only Arabic , but also has very different modes of gesturing. The body language, tone of voice are all very different when one is speaking Arabic. Arabic is a very poetic and literary language and can arouse a lot of passions. It should not surprise you if two Arabs are seen shouting at each other and swearing by God for a very insignificant reason. It is not that they mean to upset each other, but the language itself is structured to emphasise the emotions and culturally the Arabs are very emotional people.

Some observations about the language and communicating with Arabs in general

1) Emotions and reason - Give way to your emotions. Reason doesnot have too much of a place when communicating with an average Arab. Appeal to his/ her heart and not to the mind. If an Arab likes you, he/ she will forgive you for many slips. But get on his/her wrong side, and your most articulate and well reasoned arguments will fail. By nature, the Arab society places a premium on emotional well-being and harmony. Harmony of the individual with his family, friends and society. This is also manifested in the way two arabs speak with each other - usually the language and gesticulation is very elaborate and intended to show how much they like each other ( or rather dislike as the case may be).

2)Friends first, business next - The Arabs have an attitude of building a personal rapport first, then talking about business. One of my uncles who is based in Saudi Arabia recounts incidents where in the first round of business meetings, often there is very little or almost no discussion about work. The Sheikh would entertain the guest with Arabic coffee, Dates, food and conversation about everything other than work. The idea is to get to know each other first and then discuss business. The Arabs do not like the idea of being cut and dry and getting down to business too soon. This is seen as almost being rude.

3) Insha Allah - Literally translates into " If God wills". This is probably the most used word in the region. Muslims believe that everything happens by the will of God and if he does not want something to happen, no amount of human effort can bring it to completion. This is reflected in the use of Insha Allah. This doesnt in any way imply fatalistic attitude, but rather a mind-set which believes that we can only take care of the efforts; but results are in God's hands. And most of those who use it, mean to use it in the right spirit. Well, there are always exceptions to the rule...so you need to watch out the person who is using this word rather than the word itself.

4)Ma'alish - "Take it easy". Another attitude to life. The Arabs can be quite laid back and relaxed about certain things. There is a certain relaxed attitude to life in general and not the competitive dog-eat-dog attitude of the western world. Work happens at its own pace and things will fall into place over a period of time.

These are some pointers to dealing and communicating with an Arab. Of course there are exceptions to these rules and many western educated Arabs may be markedly different in terms of their attitudes. But these are some guidelines which may be of use so as not to offend anyone and also to gain insights into how the Arabs behave.